69th Anal Ugly Sweater Hash

What: Larrikins 69th Anal Ugly Sweater Hash Where: North Hills! Leg 1: Spreads in the Sheets volunteered to hare the first leg and choose Glitter Puss as her co-hare. She gave us a sheet of naughty holiday songs for us to enjoy on trail (attached!). A lazy blessing by Face and they were off! FRB KY Soze was given the holiday fruitcake to carry on trail. The pack took off through some neighborhoods and generally meandered their way into the North Hills shopping center. We met the hares in the middle of the shopping center for a rousing holiday song and finished following marks to our first destination. Beer Stop 1: Fox & Hound. Fairly uneventful with many a strange look from muggles. The family in front of said restaurant seemed unimpressed with our dirty Frosty song, but their kids sure did enjoy it! Leg 2: Chunky in the Back & Taint My Jelly took over as hares for the 2nd leg. We took off around the corner and down the escalators to a dance line/song check in front of the Target Entrance. It was SO FESTIVE. Many members of the pack were tricked by Chunky's long ass false down Glenwood Ave., but we finally wised up, HEADed back to the rest of the pack and crossed the street to our next destination. Beer Stop 2: World of Beer. Great outdoor covered patio where we started a dance party. Dancing was had, I grinded on Just Kate, and we all earned a lot of strange stares from the muggles indoors. Leg 3: Santa Packin' a Hot Lunch took over as hare. We wandered out of the restaurant and continued wandering in and around the Harris Teeter grocery store. We made it around the building to the other side of the shopping center, where we spent more time wandering around the garage. The pack finally got its shit together and found marks that led us directly into a tree selling lot. We found a sled and sang some songs and then found a BIGGER SLED where we had time to sing even more! The pack took off from here, fairly convinced we were going back to start, but boy oh boy, were we wrong! Instead we ended up at.... Beer Stop 3: Yard House! LARGE BEERS FOR ALL! Was it just me, or were these bars surprisingly packed for a Wednesday evening? Chunky was immediately swept up by 2 cougars at the bar who needed a lengthy explanation of what hashing was. Glitter, KY, and Face encountered an extremely drunk, short man who seemed QUITE offended by Glitter's multiple use of the word Pedophile. It literally sent him fleeing from the bar. Spreads drank a glass of wine? And strange looks from ALL of the muggles put us all in the hashy holiday spirit Leg 4: Our last hares were Rusty Pole and Visitor KY Soze. We took off from the bar and immediately got lost. Your scribe wandered off from the pack and started zenning. She had a lucky break at the check on Glenwood and and went the right way back across the street. Said scribe found a mark that was clearly laid by the visitor, looked across the street, saw the hares, and said screw the rest of trail and shortcutted across, where she quickly caught up the hares, who neither saw/heard her coming. A short jaunt from here got us back to start. Apparently the rest of the pack was wandering around a parking garage for a while. On-In/Circle: We were joined by latecummers Dictaphone, Charlie Hardwood Whore, Too Lazy For Condoms, and No Shit, There I Was. Glitter Puss led circle in his trademark tiny shorts and kitty vest. Visitors, roadwhores, hares, and many more drank for a variety of reasons. Glitter & KY had a short-shorts dance-off where Glitter was the clear winner. Most festive attire awards go to Santa Packin', CPU, and Chunky is some suspenders that I snapped the shit out of multiple times. Special award to Just Kate for sewing her own shirt out of a blanket. Both visitors, as well as Just Kate & Packin' finished the Glitter Puss Challenge (thank you Box Rot for taking over marking duties). On-After: Chuy's was closed and people ended up at Fox & Hound. At this point your lovely scribe HEADed home with Spreads, so it's a mystery as to what happened next. on-Ilovethehash-on Face Down No One to Blow *She got drunk! **may also include stretching the truth, fuzzy details, and flat out lies